8 long years
by SuperHansi
Summary: "It took me 8 years. 8 years till I made the biggest mistake of my life."


**It took him 8 years.**

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It took me 8 years. 8 long years full of hatred, anger and pain. 8 years and about 247 broken bones and 26 jobs I got fired from.  
This chase ruled my life. I sometimes felt like I was born just for that chase. It was my reason for living on every time I just wanted to end it all. It gave me strength for all the wrong reasons. The hatred and the desire to kill kept me alive.

It took me 8 years. 8 long years till I could wrap my hands around the skinny little neck. 8 years until I was finally faster, stronger and smarter than him. I beat him in his own game and I didn't even cheat. I had just gotten better and better till I had surpassed him and then I just struck. The moment was perfect. His moans. His groans. His blood. His tears.  
I felt so powerful and I got stronger with every shuddering breath he took. I was getting higher and higher with every beat of his heart. It was a wonderful feeling. I felt like the god he had always wanted to be.

It took me 8 years. 8 long years before I realized just how pathetic he really was, just how weak he was behind that mask of his. As I listened to his last words I realized that he was an even greater monster than me. At least I cared for my friends and my family. He was just messing around with everybody. He didn't even know what love is. This made me feel so smart. I knew about something he didn't. It was a good feeling at it made everything just so much better.

It took me 8 years. 8 long years till I first heard him beg. He wasn't the great god he had always pretended to be anymore. He was weak, fragile and broken. Broken in just so many ways. Body, mind, spirit and will. He knew that it would end that day. He knew everything was going to be over in mere moments but he still tried to annoy me. The look in his eyes. The sound of his voice. He was making me so angry and I was blinded by rage so I just squeezed harder. His talking stopped. Finally. No more words. I wouldn't have to hear his annoying voice anymore. Never again.

I took me 8 years. 8 long years before I was able to wipe that smirk of his face. That stupid damn smirk. It had always disgusted me but that didn't matter anymore, it was gone. That disturbing smile was gone forever. I would never have to see it again. I was filled with joy.  
But he still had this provoking look in his eyes. They weren't filled with pain, fear and sadness like the rest of him. They weren't shuddering like his body or trembling like his lips. His eyes weren't fully opened but wide enough to get me to squeeze even harder. It didn't help, the look in his eyes, this damn mischievous glimmer, was still there. I squeezed even harder. Still no change.

My eyes were fixed on his and my hands were squeezing his neck more and more. I got angry. The damn look just wouldn't disappear. I started to shout. I shouted horrible things. I can't even remember all of it. But he deserved every insult I threw at him, every name I called him. He deserved every fucking word. He deserved all of it and so much more. But none of them changed anything. His eyes still stayed the same. I now couldn't squeeze any tighter, so I let go. I gave up. I took my hands away from his neck. Dark purple bruises started to show right where my hands had been just seconds ago.  
I raised my right hand to punch him right in the face, hoping the look in his eyes would finally change to one of horror and fear. But I stopped.  
My eyes widened and I dropped my hand, letting it rest at my side. My mouth dropped open and I stopped breathing for a few seconds, then I threw my head back and laughed. I sounded like a mad man. I laughed loud and louder. I had done it.

I finally did it. It was over. Everything was over. The chase was over and I had won. I won and he lost. I actually won. I couldn't stop the look in his eyes but I had stopped everything else. His movements, his begging, his voice and at last his breathing. His life. I ended his life. _**He was dead.  
**_Finally dead. I was free, finally free. He would never bug me again. Never again. He would never be my reason for staying alive again, because now, I killed him. Not that he's dead, now that I killed him, I can rest knowing that he was the first to die. Knowing that I had won.

I was finally free of his smirk, his laugh, his eyes, his fast legs that could carry him for hours without getting tired, his arms and hands that had always managed to pull that switchblade of his from anywhere in mere seconds. I was free of him. Free. He was gone and he was not coming back. He was never coming back.  
I was still laughing. It echoed from the walls in the dark alley way. The place where I had done it. The place that marked my new achieved freedom. The place, where I was reborn.  
I felt happy, relieved and free. I was laughing so hard that I didn't notice the tears falling freely from my eyes. I didn't notice them streaming down my cheeks. I didn't even notice that my laughter was slowly turning into sobbing and I didn't hear the sound my heart made, the moment it broke.

It took me 8 years. 8 long years till I made the biggest mistake of my life. I took me all these years to realize that I had mistaken love for hatred.

_I took me 8 years. 8 long years until I killed the love of my life, Orihara Izaya.  
_

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**_so yeah, that's it. first one-shot I'm going to post on here. I hope you like it. I hope there aren't too many mistakes in there, but if there are I'm blaming that on being german. :D  
And before you comment saying "The narrator is repeating himself so much." It's supposed to be that way. ;)  
So thank you for reading! :) please tell me if you liked it, but also tell me if you didn't like it so I can do better next time!_**


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